Saturday, June 16, 2007

Warning: Put This Book Down NOW!!

After finding an unsolicited book review on his windscreen earlier in the week, your scribe has been engrossed in wheedling and whining for a copy of said book. As the astute reader will notice from checking the comments section of the prior post, the gracious author had already emailed it to him as an attachment, and he never even noticed. How dumb is that, we all well may ask? (Please don’t answer.)

Well, when Ms. Ridley was kind enough to send a follow-up email to clue him in, your scribe promptly printed out the attachment and took it to his “office”, a stone wall on Greenwich Avenue where he reads, holds court, greets his friends, and signs the occasional book. There it was that he read Trevor and the Tooth Fairy in its not inconsiderable entirety (the process took more than one day, be it noted. He even developed a case of “reader’s cramp”, not to be confused, of course, with “writer’s cramp”.).

Your scribe now wishes to report that this book should come with a warning label. In the interests of public safety, he hereby offers the following draft of such an admonition:

Warning! Do not pick up this book. Do not open it and read one or two pages at random. Disregard of this warning may lead to fits of uncontrollable laughter and a busted gut.

Further warning: On no account read any of the sex scenes. You may wind up being arrested for spontaneous acts of public indecency.

Final warning: unless you believe in True Love, this book is most definitely NOT for you. Put it down NOW! You have been warned!!

Well, gentle reader, your scribe has done his best to make sure that the unwary and weak-minded will not pick up, or read, much less buy, this extremely dangerous book. (Remember Mallory’s definition of “daungerous”? Hoo, boy! Old Sir Tom knew whereof he spoke! This book is hot stuff!)

And so, having performed his public duty for the day, your scribe hereby retires to his “office” with the latest Clive Cussler (The Navigator), knowing that however short that book may fall of Ms. Ridley’s, at least he is in no further danger of contracting reader's cramp. When he gets bored with the episodic plots and subplots of Cussler, it's just a short jaunt down to the ferryboats and the islands beyond. Ah, summertime in Greenwich...where the living is sweet indeed!

(Word count 400+; daily challenge met and exceeded.)

3 Comments:

Blogger ERiCA said...

LOL, Bill! Nothing like a few spontaneous acts of public indecency to spice up a fine Greenwich afternoon. ;)

Your awesome reviews gave me the push I needed to renew my efforts with the next Nether-Netherland book. I'm SO excited to say I hit the halfway point (50k) with DATD last night and hope to be re-busting your gut in the very near future! *g

June 19, 2007 7:59 AM  
Blogger lacey kaye said...

*WE KNEW* it was awesome!!!

June 19, 2007 11:40 AM  
Blogger Bill Clark said...

Nothing like a few spontaneous acts of public indecency to spice up a fine Greenwich afternoon.

Yeah - Greenwich, like most of the other prototypes of Peyton Place, has a long and lurid history of private indecenies, but very few public ones. I need more blog material, so here's hoping TATTF hits the stores soon so to keep me well supplied! ;-)

June 19, 2007 12:48 PM  

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